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How can I ease my husband's fear about the changes he sees occurring in me?
Question: I'm on Workbook Lesson 342 in ACIM today. It seems that I have changed so very much from the time I started this course. I realize that I have not really changed, I have simply come closer to remembering who I truly am.
My seeming problem is that my husband sees the changes me and is afraid. He sees that I don't get excited about those big purchases any more, such as the truck he just bought or even the house we bought last fall. He sees how I don't cling desperately to our relationship any more. I love him, but when he's not around, I don't miss him as much as I once did because I am learning to live in the moment. These changes in me are making him afraid. Do you have any words of wisdom that could help me to help ease the fear in my husband?
Answer: Thanks for writing. I am Onederful and extend love, peace, happiness, and freedom to you now and always. It is a joy to hear of Awakening experiences. I rejoice with you in your step towards freedom!
Your prayer is for help in easing the fear in your husband, yet it is the fear within which must be exposed and released. Everything perceived in the world is a reflection of what is believed in the mind. Our brothers and sisters are the mirrors in which the perception of self is seen, as long as perception lasts. Fear is an ego attempt to hold back or hold off the remembrance of the I Am Presence, for the ego is afraid of Love. "Perfect Love casts out fear" really means that Perfect Love knows not fear. Light dispels darkness because Light and darkness do not co-exist. Light is real.
In Answering your request it will be helpful to look at the ego's and the Holy Spirit's different purposes and perspectives on the idea: "help ease the fear." The ego needs your mind's devotion and belief to continue to seem to exist. The ego wants to minimize fear without letting it go, for the ego IS fear! Yet, it needs the power of your mind to maintain its seeming existence. All ego defense mechanisms are therefore for the purpose of minimizing fear while keeping it. One such defense mechanism is projection: seeing in the world what is believed and yet has been denied from awareness. Be assured that if you seem to see fear in your brother's eyes you are looking through the ego's lens and perceiving what you still believe is possible. The Holy Spirit's Purpose is the release of fear, for fear is the obstacle to the awareness of Love's Presence. The Holy Spirit literally dissolves or dispels fear as the ego is brought to the Light within. As the mind begins to Awaken to the Truth of Love, it is always important to remember to be willing to surrender—or not protect —any and all time-related beliefs (such as all scenarios, roles, self-concepts, and desired outcomes) to the Light of the Holy Spirit. You have made an inner commitment to the Holy Spirit to Wake Up to the Kingdom of Heaven within and to Know ThySelf. Our sole responsibility is to accept the Atonement or Correction for oneself, and all other seeming earthly commitments were but steps to this one final commitment. Only the final commitment of Atonement brings completion, for Atonement is the final lesson of complete forgiveness.
You are voluntarily opening to the experience of unconditional, universal Love, our very Being. Our Divine Love is Spirit and all-inclusive. Our Divine Love is the Love in and of God and is All in All. Our Divine Love is a State of Being that has no degrees or distinctions or differences, for Love is One. The world of the ego was the belief in different "kinds" of love. "Love" to the ego always reflected the belief in differences: time, bodies, roles, sexual preferences, heredity, compatibility, contact, history, ambitions, goals, etc. Yet when we are Living in the Moment, aligned with the Holy Spirit's Purpose, the differences and demarcations of the ego seem to be fading fast. This is a natural expression of miracles, for everyone and everything are included in the Holy Spirit's Gentle Perspective.
Beloved of God, you wrote: "...I am learning to live in the moment. These changes in me are making him afraid." You are learning to live in the moment, yet you must come to realize that you do not have the power to make anyone afraid. You have opened your mind to Answer the Inner Call to forgive fear and see its unreality. The ego fears the Love of God, and you are beginning to realize that you must release the ego completely to be entirely free from the illusion of fear. God creates our Self in Love, and there is no fear in our Christ Self. Love is our Home, our Natural State of Being, and fear is unreal and therefore alien to Love. Love knows ItSelf and looks on ItSelf as All there Is.
Who is our father, mother, husband, wife, sister, brother, child, neighbor, friend, or fellow human being? Beyond the veil of images, they are our very Self, the Christ. The Holy Spirit's Perspective includes all and excludes none. Everyone and everything is welcome in the Holy Spirit's Gentle Gaze! What does the Holy Spirit's Perspective cost? Nothing, for All that God Gives is freely Given forever and ever! Images are fleeting and temporary— they seem to come and they seem to go. God's Love has no beginning and no end and remains Eternally the Same—Constant and Absolute and Infinite. Awakening might be called the giving up of nothing and the remembrance of Everything! Forgiveness is not difficult—it is easy. The seeming desire to cling to illusion and fear—that was the pseudo experience of "difficulty." Thanks be to God—illusion need not be experienced at all!
The Holy Spirit Guides Us safely, surely, and specifically. All that is required is willingness to take the inner steps that are Asked by the Holy Spirit. I am with you every step of the way Beloved One, and failure is impossible. Destiny Calls to accept the inevitable Correction to the belief in separation from God. God's Will is for Perfect Happiness, and nothing can prevail against a Child of God Who hears and follows God's Gentle and Certain Voice.
Express the Love in our Heart to everyone the Holy Spirit sends to you without reservation or hesitation. Hold nothing back in sharing this Divine Love, and you will see no one as separate or different from our Spirit. In every seeming meeting or encounter, I Am Present. Our Divine Love transcends the perception of bodies and differences. Love is Universal. Love is Kind. Love does not possess. Love Is Now!
I love You forever and ever, David