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Can you help me go beyond feeling like I'm stuck and not progressing?
I was recently confronted by one of my spiritual teachers who vehemently declared that all I wanted was a boyfriend, and that I was so rebellious and defiant that I would only remain as “potential” and never “bear fruit.” I was absolutely devastated and experienced lots of mixed feelings of guilt and hopelessness and fear. My mind feels strained with a big lump in it, and I'm in a bit of a quandary—my decision is to let this grievance go, but it seems like I really want to hang onto it and justify my pathetic self-image in order to be right.
Thanks for sharing your heart and your willingness to ask for Help. You have been called to shine the Light as a teacher of God, a miracle worker. As you share the Light, the Holy Spirit convinces the sleeping mind that it IS the Light. Nobody can tell you Who You are, yet the experience of Identity in God is inevitable. Do not look to man or woman for this recognition. There is nothing of the five senses that is reliable in recognizing the Truth of One Self. The Holy Spirit guides unfailingly, and confidence will grow in accepting the correction for all doubt and error. All doubt is doubt about Self.
When someone seems to tell you a lie about Self, the only response from the Spirit within is gentle laughter. "Choose again and you will see this differently" washes the mind free of doubt for a willing heart and thankful mind. Outgrow the concept of an "external" teacher, and see how quickly the confidence in miracles grows. Authentic Awakening rests on trust, honesty, and integrity and is a Living demonstration of Divine Love. Role models fall by the wayside as the inner recognition dawns. Seek not outside our Self, for all idols have fallen away before the Light of our Eternal Love.
Love and Blessings Always,