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SearchAfter all my Course study, why do I still get angry?
Question:
I have been facilitating two groups here, for the past three years. Yet I feel I must be a total beginner because just before this meeting started I was feeling great anger, and I don't know how to deal with it!
Answer:
When emotions are so strong, it gives you a strong impetus for a change of mind. When anger arises, the ego temptation is to project that anger and look for causes in the world. But it is really the ego having a tantrum, demanding that God make this world real. The ego has been at its game a long time, always hoping to wear God down and get Him to grant reality to the ego's fantasy. But God would not be God if He did this. God is Eternal and Pure Love. God's creation Christ is also Eternal and Pure Love. The ego is the belief that it is possible to leave the mind of God and make up a world completely different from the Kingdom of Heaven. The ego has defined God as angry. It tries to tell God how to be God, and the ego has convinced the sleeping mind that it is not possible to go back to the Kingdom of Heaven. Every time anger arises in the mind, it is the ego determined to be right about the world it made.
In "A Course In Miracles" Jesus says that you must look on the full extent of your hatred before you can let the hatred go. So everyone who works with the Course comes inward to that point where the anger is very intense. It is rage. And the more you work with "A Course In Miracles," the more you realize that the anger is not because of anything in the world. In this sense it is a very generalized anger. You feel angry, but you can't even think of anything specific to be angry about. With this, you know that you are getting close to the bottom of your mind. The ego set the world up as a world of duality, and the ego is the belief in private minds with private thoughts.
We have had many hilarious experiences as we go deep into the mind. The key is, when the anger comes up into awareness, call on a miracle and you will be able to laugh at it.
Learn to not take it personally, because anger properly perceived is always a call for help. It is as if your mind is saying: Please teach me that I am not this person. When you perceive with the Holy Spirit you will laugh. With everyone that I work with and at the many gatherings I speak at, I am always encouraging people to get in touch with their feelings. If you are not able to acknowledge your feelings, then you are twice removed from letting it go.
There are two things that will really flush the anger up: silence and relationships. You will find that when you attempt to meditate, as you go much deeper, the ego's anger is stirred up. With everyday relationships, it can seem as if the ego is in your face. This is really a time for gratitude, because the anger had been kept unconscious and now has come up for healing. It is never what is happening in the world that is causing this. It is just that your mind is ready and willing for it to be healed. So even though it feels difficult and intense, it is something to celebrate. Now you can let it go. That is why it is so important for you to feel and speak about whatever you are in touch with. It is also important to be gentle with yourself.
Love,
David