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I sometimes crave the company of others, but more often feel like I just want to be alone. Is this normal?
Question: I have been a student of ACIM for more than ten years. I live alone and like my own company but occasionally feel the need for contact with others. However, two very long telephone conversations this week and an afternoon spent with friends has sent me into hermit crab mode. I remembered that I really want to be alone. Too much conversation drains me and makes me feel very dull. I'm confused—surely its "normal" to want the company of others?
Answer: Thanks for writing. Just as the tide of the ocean seems to ebb and flow, so the journey within seems to at times involve the company of others and at times solitude. As the mind releases the body identification, "alone" is retranslated into "All One." Your honest experience and attitudes are your Guide as to what is most helpful at any given moment. Honesty is consistency of thought, and as the ego dissolves the mind remembers its natural Integrity and Wisdom.
The subject/object, perceiver/perceived, observer/observed split is healed through true forgiveness. In the Company of the Holy Spirit, happily the concepts of "others" and "hermit" are washed away like sand castles on the beach when the Tide of Love comes in. You are Perfect just as You are, for God made no mistake in our Identity. I join with you in accepting the Gift of Identity in Christ Which transcends the ego concepts of "personality self” and "others." Now is the rest and alertness and energy of our Self in God.
"Should’s" and "ought to's" are draining judgments. The Holy Spirit Guides unfailingly and intuitively. You are perfect right Now. The ego's definition of normal is "average,” but you were created Perfectly and therefore will never be content with average. Emotional dullness always results from a compromise attempt. Let the Holy Spirit Guide you steadfastly and you will only experience aliveness, alertness, and joy. The ego's cloud of "people-pleasing" is coming undone as you Answer God's Call to forgive illusions and recognize the truth.
Love & Blessings, David